Tiggers Are Not Tigers!

I had a heated debate sometime back with a loved one on what exactly was a Tigger. My opponent's premise was that there isn't such a thing as a Tigger, so a Tigger is a tiger, just improperly pronounced by a child. Not so fast, I said. There may not in reality be any such thing as a Tigger, but in the mind of Christopher Robin, or should that be A. A. Milne, there most definitely was such a thing as a Tigger. Just because there isn't one in reality doesn't mean there's no such thing. Plus, as Ravi Zacchariah points out, in order to say that something DOESN'T exist, one would have to be all knowing; therefore making one a know-it-all.

Here are my arguments on Tiggers not being tigers. First, the word Tigger always appears in capitals in Milne's books indicating a name, but also indicating only one. Here's an example from the book House at Pooh Corner: "So that's what Tiggers like!" Just as Monday is the only day of the week called "Monday" and therefore always capitalized; for instance, "I'm going to the park next Monday." There's more than 1 tiger in the world.

The word tiger does not appear in any of Milne's Pooh books. All the other animals are pronounced and spelled correctly. Below is a list of differences I've noted between Tiggers and tigers (you may have to scroll down a ways, Blogger is having trouble with my table). After perusing the list, one could go to the Wikipedia and check out the first sentence in the entry for Tigger; but I'm not one to rely on consensus as a valid argument so ... nevermind.

Hopefully all of this will cement the argument and all will be well in the world. Tiggers are the same thing as tigers!? Don't be ridicarus.

Attribute	Tiggers	Tigers
They're wonderful things	Yes. They are things not animals. As the next 2 attributes will attest.	Nope. They're wonderful animals. Full of wonder just as all of God's creation.
Tops are made out of rubber	Yes	Nope.
Bottoms are made out of springs. Disney portrays him with a spring in his tail. I contest this. I'm certain it was his bottom, since the original illustration by Shepard never shows him bouncing around on his tail. Besides, if the spring was in his tail, it would be "Tails are made out of springs."	Yes	Nope.
Bouncy, trouncy, flouncy, pouncy	Yes	Well...I guess you could say tigers are all that.
Wonderful chaps	Yes	Too scary to be wonderful chaps.
Loaded with vim and vigor	Yes	They may exhibit some vim and vigor, but I don't think they're loaded with it.
Love to leap into your laps	Yes	Leap on you, maybe. But not specifically your lap. If you're sitting in a chair and a tiger comes in, he's going for the head not the lap.
Jumpy, bumpy, clumpy, thumpy	Yes	Jumpy maybe, but bumpy or clumpy? Sounds more like an overused stuff toy.
They're cuddly fellows	Yes	Maybe a tiger cub, but not a tiger.
Awfully sweet	Yes. Probably the reason for the next attribute. Too much sweet.	Fairly certain tigers don't taste sweet.
Dislikes the taste of honey	Yes	Fairly certain a tiger will turn up his nose to honey.
Number in existence	1	Around 2,000 according to Wikipedia.
Walks around comfortably on 2 feet.	Yes. One may argue that this is not a valid attribute since he's a contrivance, BUT Eore is a contrivance of a donkey and he never walks around on 2 feet! Ah HAH!	Nope
Never get lost	True. He states such and appeared to back it up when Rabbit intentionally tried to lose him and there has been no evidence to the contrary.	Unknown. I suspect they get lost, though. They're just too cool to let on.

Days Of "Your"

It's been a while and I feel like ranting a bit, so PAY ATTENTION! I feel like doing holidays, so let's have a go at birthdays. Everyone's own holiday. I'll do other stupid holidays later.

Birthdays. I don't like'm. Those of you who know me already know this of course, but I thought I'd put down on "paper" why. Most importantly, they encourage the immature to be even more self-centered. Something in which a fallen mankind doesn't need any encouraging. Gasoline on a fire if you ask me.

We don't do big b'day parties at our house. Someone usually makes a cake, we pop some candles in there and sing happy birthday (after I jokingly sing Happy Self Indulgence Day). We have a simple gift and that's it. And that's me compromising.

I remember taking Lizzie to a birthday party in our old neighborhood when she was young. She's always been a friendly girl, eager to make friends and was very excited that someone in the neighborhood had invited her to a party. When we arrived, the little girl runs out to meet her PRESENT! She rips the thing from Lizzie's hands and goes running inside with it. As I looked at Lizzie's shell shocked expression and tried to put a good face on the situation, I realized there are moments in a grown man's life where you have to resist the urge to vomit and cry simultaneously in order to console the injured. Needless to say, the rest of the abysmal event has been blotted from my memory. I know you're tempted to conclude that this event is the one that spawned my distaste for days such as this, but don't go there. It was just a day that cemented my already valid opinion as my wife will attest.

I use to try to see if I could go all day without someone noticing it was my birthday. My mom says I did that so I could beat all my loved ones over the head the fact that they forgot it, but that's only because I used to do it to her as a preemptive "guilt trip". I've found that "guilt trips" can be utterly destroyed by one of your own choosing when fired at the proper time. They do have to be based in fact, though. I have repented of that now and also of trying to avoid my birthday being noticed. I found that my wife wasn't sure if she should wish me happy birthday or not and now realize that I was unnecessarily stressing her out.

They're a western 20th century invention, from what I understand. Before then you might celebrate someones 1st birthday or when they get on in years. I was bemoaning this fact to my family one time and talked of a conversation I had with an oriental woman. She said that for birthdays in her country, it was customary to give gifts rather than expect and demand them; a habit of hobbits my daughter Sarah reminded me. Lo and behold, on Sarah's birthday that year we all got presents; all nice hand made art work. Now that's how you celebrate a birthday.

I HAVE been to some good birthday parties, just to be fair. Jessica B's was the last one we went to and it was good! I judge a good birthday party as one where you see little to no evidence that it's a birthday party. They appear to just be parties that happen on someone's birthday. A good time was had by all.

Here's a suggestion. Instead of b'days, why not just do something nice for those you love on a random day of the year. If all goes well, you might even do it twice a year! They won't be expecting it and it would mean so much more, since the victim knows you weren't "obligated" to do it in the first place.